tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-145707092024-03-13T09:10:31.385-07:00Miss Melanoma: The Official Site for the Fun Side of CancerSharing knowledge, hope and humor to fellow survivors.
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"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
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- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.comBlogger290125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-24711215116217345902014-11-24T19:42:00.000-08:002014-11-24T19:47:14.504-08:00Miss MelanomaDear All,
It has been a long time, huh? Even if I had a week to write to all of the changes that have happened in my life, I don't think I'd have the time to explain it all to you. It's kind of incredible how things can flip just like that over a couple of years --- and very little can remain the same it was---- but life goes on and I can assure you that it is good. Crazy, Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-52265450198232566912013-06-06T14:13:00.000-07:002013-06-06T14:22:32.685-07:00Whole Lotta LoveMy friend, Joy, says that when I'm stressed I look at funny animal pictures. So.... here they are! hahaha
And a couple of my own babies.....
Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-50735712431050004962013-05-06T13:09:00.003-07:002013-05-06T13:23:10.116-07:00Dazed and Confused Wow, it's been quite a while since I posted. I look back at posts from a year ago or even just a few months, and my life is vastly different from what it was. Looking at me from the outside, you would probably not realize it, but on the inside I feel like my whole life has transformed.
The school year is wrapping up, and although it's been a tough year, I must say that the oldMiss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-86869130138481002572013-01-29T15:51:00.001-08:002013-01-30T20:20:27.884-08:00Walking through the Spider WebsSome times I come here and have so much to say, but stop myself because what if it offends this person or that person, or what if people don't agree or whatever. And then I thought, do those people even read this blog? Probably not. lol And today I'm in one of those writing moods, and feeling honest, and feeling like clearing out the cobwebs in my head.
I've written about this before, so Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-508099445223915122013-01-22T18:17:00.001-08:002013-01-22T18:17:21.809-08:00The Mirror has Two Faces (hehe)This may be the longest break I have ever taken from writing on this blog, and that's totally my bad. I could give you the usual run-around about checking out of my life, but you're probably here reading this to hear how I'm doing now. So here goes.
Lately I've been looking in the mirror and feeling really different about what I see. I feel like a different woman inside than IMiss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-36411597793167935582012-10-14T22:07:00.002-07:002012-10-14T22:07:33.226-07:00Like WhoaIt has been a crazy couple of months, and it's strange to look back at this blog and see that my last post at the beginning of August and the disarray my life appeared to be then.
And here we are in October. School is in full swing and is as crazy as ever. There have been a lot of management changes in my district and we have all been affected. Teachers more than anyone, but everyone is onMiss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-20178517400718670802012-08-03T13:55:00.000-07:002012-08-03T13:55:04.992-07:00Sacred, by Suzanne Falter Barns
You are divine.
Perhaps in the flow of your life you've forgotten this.
You are a sacred child ... one who makes mistakes, and then gets up again - although it seemed like a good idea at one point to stay curled up forever.
You are bliss incarnate.
Have you forgotten?
You are every single person you touch, inside and out.
You know their pain, their resistance, their upsets, their longings.Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-90673452247768245332012-07-28T12:39:00.000-07:002012-07-28T12:40:49.871-07:00Brand new dayThe 5 stages of grief are:
1. Denial and Isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance
Last night's post was obviously from the depression stage. haha Whoa, what a downer.
I'm noticing I'm moving in and out of the last three stages pretty regularly almost every day. I miss the way things used to be, then I think what if I had only done this? or what if Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-76715931439766782352012-07-27T21:56:00.001-07:002012-07-28T10:30:10.632-07:00Hard and Cold
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They say you should never ask a scorpio a question unless you want to hear the truth. Because a scorpio will tell you, even if you can't handle it. And I'm going to tell you the truth right now, even though I can barely handle it.
Lately, every day seems a little better than the last. And these days, I'm Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-20320438558844846352012-07-10T13:34:00.001-07:002012-07-10T13:34:31.549-07:00The Journey, by Mary Oliver
The Journey
One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice--
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-72788702350608068242012-07-01T21:11:00.000-07:002012-07-05T22:19:49.816-07:00Blessed
There is nothing more humbling than chaos in your life. Or debilitating sadness. Starting over after so long with so little faith in yourself. Or regret.
But today there was sunshine and hope, and I made a list of things I have to be thankful for....
I'll share it with you. :)
1. I'm cancer free and alive and able to do things I've always dreamed Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-40895116855531552622012-06-26T16:18:00.001-07:002012-06-26T16:43:17.369-07:00I'm Understanding More
Please keep me in your prayers. I am fragile, but growing.
-MMMiss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-27723707330389429442012-06-22T17:07:00.001-07:002012-06-22T17:15:54.322-07:00Best day of my LifeI don't really know where any of this is going.... so you guys are just gonna get "train of thought" writing today.
Today I feel empty, disconnected, hurt. I've been thinking a lot of my own importance or lack thereof.
There is a huge realization that I have filled my life, from a very early age, with people that put their own needs before mine. And the strangest thing I can say Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-7108850151745118442012-06-12T02:29:00.000-07:002012-06-22T17:17:34.966-07:00Truth Be ToldIt's been a long time since I've posted, and there's so much to tell you that it would be easier to talk about the things that haven't changed in my life than what has.
That's a whole lotta change.
But tonight instead of thinking of change, I'm thinking of people. People in my life. The ones who have entered and left over the years. The ones who dropped out and the ones whoMiss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-60016946354861695362012-04-26T02:12:00.000-07:002012-04-26T02:12:56.553-07:00Photo Sunday, slightly delayed
We're just skipping over the awkwardness of how I'm doing and going straight to photo Sunday. And yes, it's Wednesday.
If you've read this blog at all, you know that I'm very anti-Dallas.
But I swear my little neighborhood, Deep Ellum, makes me feel like I could be anywhere- Austin, San Diego, Denver even maybe? It's so angsty and anti-establishment it, even I feel like an artist.Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-10956848519855013422012-04-16T23:10:00.001-07:002012-05-23T18:25:07.314-07:00Marathon PostSo I'm talking to my therapist, who asks if I am blogging.
"No," I say. "Every time I open up to my blog I just think, Ugh. I don't even have the energy to deal with this life." Because it's so much, isn't it? Even if you don't have cancer, even if you don't have chronic pain, life is SO MUCH to deal with. Just the every day of it is enough to wear me out sometimes.
Also, of courseMiss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-12119129482029315482012-03-04T23:26:00.001-08:002012-05-23T18:29:02.181-07:00I should buy a boat
Wow, a lot's happened since the last post. Let me wrap it up for ya:
1. finally got a for-real diagnosis
2. got a Rx for physical therapy
3. got new stuff to help deal with anxiety
4. got the pain much more under control, but I'm a little loopy all the time these days....
and, perhaps biggest of all, I write this knowing that tomorrow I'm going in to work to tell them I'm staying Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-39511398249552812202012-02-29T19:53:00.001-08:002012-02-29T19:53:44.424-08:00YesEvery once in a while, all of the power- the attention- that you have comes to bear on exactly what you're doing. And it doesn't decide whether it's good or bad, it just decides that it is.  And the only thing you can do is enjoy the ride. - Ken Kesey
Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-13350891842739319322012-02-28T20:32:00.000-08:002012-05-23T18:22:15.693-07:00Whomp whompIt's been almost two months of being in pain. I'm not sure how long I've been using the wheelchair, but I'm like over it. For real. I've known this whole time that my mental state was slipping. I told friends that I felt like I was losing it a little bit, but it never really seemed that serious.
But for the last week or two I've felt like I was always 5 minutes away from Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-34655786118102078012012-02-07T13:31:00.000-08:002012-02-07T13:31:25.645-08:00Aha Moment
“For a long time it seemed to me that if I could just endure a little longer and be patient, I could resume my life. But it was one disease after another. It seemed as if I was taking one step forward and then [one step] back- always an obstacle in my path to good health. Then, at last, it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.”
Great article: Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-70124342112453036452012-01-31T23:01:00.000-08:002012-02-01T12:43:21.864-08:00JeniusIt has been a rough week. I am now using a wheelchair. Some days I feel pretty good and have just a little pain, some days it hurts too bad to stand. I feel confident that by next week I will be out of the wheelchair and able to walk again, at least for a week or so. Lately I've been expecting this sort of setback very on schedule and just kind of deal with them. :) Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-84391724190770265622012-01-17T21:46:00.000-08:002012-05-23T18:13:29.789-07:00Real TalkDon't ever tell a kid they aren't sick when they really are. Don't ever try to convince them that what's really wrong with them is only in their head when they are genuinely suffering.
I say that because I know what happens to kids that go through that-- they end up like me. And I am a hot mess when it comes to listening to my body signals.
My house was not always the easiest Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-4701331204215509172011-12-03T13:23:00.001-08:002011-12-03T14:46:40.525-08:00You need to read this!
I tried to cut it down and make it shorter, but there were so few words that felt gratuitous. :)
"There you are, and you suddenly realize that you are spending your whole life just barely getting by. You keep up a good front. You manage to make ends meet somehow and look okay from the outside. But those periods of desperation, those times when you feel everything Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-70111908413868248482011-11-27T22:00:00.000-08:002011-11-28T11:39:54.945-08:00Medical UpdateSo, let me start by telling you that this post will talk a lot about my uterus. Consider yourself warned. :)
iheartguts.com
Let me try and sum up what's been going on in as short a post as possible. I've typed this out several times, and it's been excruciatingly long. There's no point in anyone having to read that much about my uterus.
During Interferon, I went Miss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14570709.post-1427580272119080652011-11-27T15:00:00.000-08:002011-11-27T21:57:36.088-08:00Random, but cool
You gotta check this out.
http://www.divine.ca/en/fitness-and-nutrition/exercise-finder/c_266/
By clicking on the body part, you get a list of exercises. Great for workout ideas. Or for a deterring making those bacon chocolate chip cookies you saw the recipe for. mmmmmmmmmmmm
-MMMiss Melanomahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09018657216901427823noreply@blogger.com1