Thursday, April 27, 2006

Straitjacket sold separately.

Well, kids, I set myself a weekly reminder to do a blog, and so here I am doing it. This week being on chemo after having 2 weeks off was rougher than I thought it'd be. The nausea isn't bad, but some of the other side effects I'd had in the beginning have come back, so I've been on a lot more drugs than I was before. That may not really seem significant, but it means I'm only awake a few hours a day. I know I've missed some calls from some of you, but I'm pretty out of it, and would just rather call you back when I know what's going on. This is really all I can write for now, but I'll be in touch soon.

-L

Thursday, April 20, 2006

“Friends are God's way of apologizing to us for our families.”

Aahh, vacation. Aahh, San Diego.
The sun, the ocean, the laid-back atmosphere, the lack of mosquitos, the cheap access to alcohol. Tell me, who could ask for more? Only crackheads, I'll tell you that... and I've got living proof. Took my Boobie to SD, we got to do all the touristy things, gamble a bit, went to TJ (or Tijuana, to the untrained border hopper), L.A., and just had an awesome time in general. I didn't have to do chemo, and feeling good and being able to get up before 4 p.m. was a real eye opener for me. A part of me still can't believe how chemo effects me (because in my mind, I'm Supergirl, I guess), but it was so great just to feel normal again, and a real inspiration to finish these last 3 months of chemo. I definately didn't miss the rash, the fevers, headaches, or the IBS, but it was a good reminder as to what life will be like soon. (Insert Cinderella "Don't know what you got till it's gone" song here.)

High on the list of phenomenal activities was seeing my good friend Mandy. It was good, a real treat, just to be near her again, and it hurt to remember how much I miss her. I guess through all of this, I've cut myself off a bit- (and by "a bit" I mean "totally") just so I can focus on doing what I have to do to get this over with. Being there again, being able to wake up in the morning and walk into another room to see her and just talk like we used to every day- it really reconnected me to so much I had almost forgotten. It made me remember who I was before all of this, and reminded me of who I am today, what I've learned, and who I want to be. And, of course, it made me realize how lucky I've been this whole time, lucky to be given such amazing people in my life, amazing friends all over that care about me and who show me all the time what a gift friendship is.

Another cool part was that we got to spend a few days together, some real qualtiy time, and I feel luckier than ever to be so blessed by this friendship. This last year has been a testament to how easy it is to lose touch when you're so caught up with yourself, and so much going on with both of us, it's crazy how quickly time passes. She's planning a HUGE wedding, and to finally know what I can do to help was a relief in and of itself. I feel like we finally kinda got caught up, which is important to me, and we had fun doing it. I miss her so bad sometimes it's pitifull, but I don't think it'll be this way forever. Visiting her was by far the best part of the trip, as seeing her always is.



Okay, enough of that. I'm gettin' misty. My little girl is growing up so fast.

San Diego, San Diego. Too expensive to live there, but my what a happy place. The weather was better than we could've even requested, 65 everyday and sunny, a room with a view, and the booze was flowing freely. With no nausea, it was amazing to be able to eat veggies again without puking, and having some drinks after dinner felt so freeing. How easily we all forget how lucky we are for the little things! I mean, I'm not saying I didn't definately feel 31 after that 4th day of hangovers, but it was all worth it.

TJ was a blast: Bobby's first experience with Homeland Security. They even invited him to stay, but he regretfully declined. :) I love that place... it's so festive and fun. The Mexicans really know how to party. And, I mean, who can hate a country where tequila flows like a river and they just pour it straight from the bottle into your mouth? Why waste a shot glass? It's ecologically friendly.

L.A. (or Smell-A, as some would say) was, of course, a blast... again, when people walk around in Elvis suits, who can deny the beauty of the city? Did get to see lots of stars homes, and had no idea I had such a natural abilty to stalk stars. Should've been paparazzi, I tell you. Creamed my panties in front of John Travolta's gate, and actually licked the doorknob of the Playboy Mansion just for good measure. Also rubbed some pink parts on Billy Graham's star, which the locals thought was amusing. Overall, Bobby and I looked like crazy Texas tourists, but had such a good time it didn't even matter. I could've been a contender.

Good times. Definately the best vacation I've ever been on, and I think it was because we had so much time just to relax, take our time, and do exactly whatever we wanted to do. We got to see it all: the Gaslamp, Ocean Beach, NUNU's, Mission Beach, Hillcrest, Pacific Beach- if they served liquor, we were there. And I even got to catch up with some good friends and revisit them. Bug came in, and it was so good to see her (see the whole "blessed to have such awesome people in my life" thing above) I had some drinks with little Anthony and my dear Martin, and couldn't have been happier about all that.
It was a great trip, too, because I got a grip on how healthy I used to be, and what bad habits I've fallen into while on chemo. Being home these last couple of days has made me focus on what I know I need to work on, and it's been twice as easy falling back into healthy habits after seperating myself from it all for a couple of weeks. Overall, kids, I highly recommend America's finest city, and hope that all of you enjoy your friends as much as I do.

That's it for now, but I'll check in soon. Take cara yous.

-L

i2y

I'm Too Young For This!