At first glance it might seem like a negative title, but in reality, let's face it, shit happens. I try not to use too much profanity on this site, but I think today calls for it.
I've been busy. Busy, actually, is an understatement, and I know that a lot of that business comes from me just having something else to think about besides cancer for a change. The whole time I was doing chemo I asked myself how much it really sucked and how other people went through the same treatment so much more gracefully. Was I faking it? The answer, now, looking back, was no, I wasn't faking it. I was just on a lot of drugs and under a lot of influences and didn't feel like myself.
Now I wonder why I'm so lucky. I have all these wonderful people around me that have gone through the same thing, and now they're not okay. Now they're dealing with more stuff, and getting more treatment, and having more tumors removed.
And it's just not fair.
And I guess, of course, no one ever said it would be... but I'm having a tough time thinking this is okay, when it's really not. I'm really pretty pissed that this could be happening to my friends- to people who have been positive and wonderful for me, and who deserve so much better.
That's really all I know how to say right now...
I don't even think retail therapy is going to help this one.