Sunday, March 04, 2012

I should buy a boat

Wow, a lot's happened since the last post.  Let me wrap it up for ya:
1. finally got a for-real diagnosis
2. got a Rx for physical therapy
3. got new stuff to help deal with anxiety
4. got the pain much more under control, but I'm a little loopy all the time these days....

and, perhaps biggest of all, I write this knowing that tomorrow I'm going in to work to tell them I'm staying home for a while.  Yes, I am going to start my time off for disability tomorrow.  It sucks.  I don't want to do it, but I missed three days last week and I'm still not in
any physical condition to go back.  That says to me  that its time to face reality. 

 I cried a bit tonight after I finally admitted this, but I have to admit the state my body is in.  The pain has increased significantly, and even though I have it managed these days, I'm either too loopy or asleep when taking them- not exactly conducive to teaching.  We shall see what the days ahead bring. 


But I'm going to miss my kids.  


In the meantime, I'm asking for your thoughts and/or prayers.  I'll post more about the actual diagnosis and stuff soon.... just wanted to stick in an update on the mental aspects.  I swear, being sick is half a mental battle and half a physical one. 



I also want to thank my special friend who sent me a lovely plant.  It gives me something gorgeous to look at when I'm laying around.  And it has such good energy!





My friends are taking really good care of me, and we are getting to know each other in a whole new way. :) It's actually really funny the majority of the time.  They keep reminding me that "this is temporary," and that's really helping.

Lots of love, and I hope all of you are doing well, too.

-MM



8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Keeping you in my thoughts and wishing you peace of mind and healing.

The Path Traveled said...

So sorry to read your in so much pain! I will continue to pray that God will heal your body and you're pain.

Anonymous said...

This too shall pass but it sure as hell needs to hurry up!

So glad that you are taking time so that you can heal.

I bet your kids will stay in touch just like me!

You may borrow my mantra if you like - maximum results, minimum side effects.

Faith

Phyllis Stockton said...

I couldn't agree with your more that cancer is half a mental battle, and half physical. Really, it's the mental stuff that can ruin your days, and even those around you. And I find my emotions the most difficult to deal with. There's no treatment for your emotions, no prescription, or chemo. It's up to you. If you're interested http://onlinceucredit.com/edu/social-work-ceus-can has some great advice about how to cope. Anyway, just wanted to let you know that even though I don't know you, I am right there with you. I get it. And I'll be keeping you in my thoughts. We can do this.

Katie said...

Wishing you the best. Don't worry about taking time off from work--you need to devote 100% to healing your body.

Herbal Remedies said...

his too shall pass but it sure as hell needs to hurry up!Wishing you the best.dont worry you will be fine hurry up.

Anonymous said...

I have been following your blog since I was diagnosed and I drove myself crazy thinking the worst in between appointments. Your words have brought me so much comfort and I respect you so much. You are in my thoughts, and I hope that you are healing and doing better.

--D

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