Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Masterbation ups Chemo Patients Bloodcounts

I read this yesterday on the internet, so it's got to be true, right. I'm not taking any chances. :)
Today I'm feeling better with my new Rx, and I got the ol' CAT Scan taken care of, so I'm excited to be finding out what's going on in my head, besides the now constant lure of masterbation.

I also thought y'all might enjoy a "top ten" list of how to respond to nosy questions. Pass it on, or feel free to use them on your own. Here's a couple of pics of my own scar, which I usually tell people is the result of a pigmy goat mauling. From some angles, it has an uncanny resemblence to another, more, um, let's just say attractive, body part. What can I say? Who doesn't love having a prosthetic-looking sex organ laying around on your leg?

And now the top 10 responses to nosy questions about cancer and scars....
10. Chemo? It's not that bad. I just think of it as an involuntary drug habit.
9. Oh, you should see how many presents I got. Made the cancer totally worth it.
8. No, that's not just a scar, it's where my fetal siamese twin was attached.
7. You think that's bad, you should see the other guy.
6. It's getting more and more difficult to smuggle drugs these days.
5. Oh that? It's just flesh-eating bacteria.
4. You'd be amazed how much you can get for black market organs.
3. That's where the aliens put the chip to track my movements.
2. I don't really remember it. Do you know what drugs they give cancer patients?
1. I should've listened to Mom when she said don't scratch that mosquito bite.

On a random note, check out this cool website I found here on blogger: it's called Post a Secret. They've even put a book out on some of the postcards people have sent in. I think you'll find it refreshing.

Hope all is well with all of you. Let's be safe out there, and I'll check in soon.

-L

2 comments:

surlyUrbanGal said...

very good to read you are doing better... good luck with those bloodcounts :) -alicia

Anonymous said...

Hope you are doing better! We miss your laughter at Gilda's!

i2y

I'm Too Young For This!