Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Truth Be Told

It's been a long time since I've posted, and there's so much to tell you that it would be easier to talk about the things that haven't changed in my life than what has.

That's a whole lotta change.

But tonight instead of thinking of change, I'm thinking of people.  People in my life.   The ones who have entered and left over the years.  The ones who dropped out and the ones who came back.  The ones like family.  The ones who look you in the eye and make you feel like you can be better just because of the way they see you.  The ones who are all locked up inside themselves.  I think people are the most fascinating creatures, because even the predictable ones will surprise you.

Strange situations are around me, and I have actually chosen to try and be the bigger person.  I may not succeed, but I am trying. Unfortunately, it doesn't feel like growth.  It feels like hurt.  It feels like disappointment and disdain and frustration and salty tears.  So what I'm thinking about tonight is not change, but people. And how disappointing we all can be.  And petty.  And so darn unpredictable.  

But that's not what I should be thinking.  

What I should be thinking is: even if they never realize what they had, I'm here tonight loving the fact that I don't allow them to make me feel small anymore.  And that feels like growth I can actually be happy about.  

Enjoy yourself today.  You are special.  

And as big as the universe. 


1 comment:

jessica said...

I understand! You are worth every breath you take. Your blog got me through my first week after my diagnosis with Melanoma, let us help you get through this!


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