Hey kids it's me, your favorite melanoma patient. I'm just checking in on y'all during my sabbatical from the hospital. I'm home for 5 days and then back to the hospital on Monday.
Chemo wasn't so bad, kinda weird and different from what I thought it would be. I can definitely tell you I'll never be a heroin addict. They were shooting me up between my toes by the time I left because the saline couldn't be pumped into me fast enough. It's all good tho, the nurses were very cool. I look MAD HOT in those gray hospital gowns.
Hospital food left something to be desired or was it just me? Everything has a funny taste to it even now that I'm home. I guess that's Chemo for you. It's been fun just trying to find food that tastes like it's supposed to. In the hospital the banana pudding tasted like fish. The ice tasted like dirt. The grapes tasted like hand lotion. Now I'm home and it's all fun and games trying to figure out what food is going to taste like. Nachos tasted like old lettuce. Waffles were spoiled milk. It's more fun than you think. Lots of foods taste like your favorite cleaning agents. 7-Up is like Liquid Plummer for instance. Good times.
For all of you asking, no I haven't lost any hair, just on the butt. I'll keep you posted on my Susan Pewter hair do when it happens.
Until next time America, you're my schmoopie-heads.